The Flight of the Rocketman

Love might be great but why lose your head? -- Crash and Burn, Sheryl Crow

And then it was revealed. How the Spearmint reacted, well, I don't know... It was strange. I told the Spearmint how I felt: at one point in time, I fell in love with you; if I've been acting strange, maybe this will explain, this is the reason why. The response?

"I'm really sorry if I hurt you, but I just want you to know that I'm happy because I met you. God bless Wangs!"

And where do I go from here? In a way, I told the Spearmint how I felt because I wanted some sort of change. Maybe, I wanted some sort of action to take place. If no reply of reciprocation was to be given, I could take it as some sign that I should let go and move on... I don't know what that answer means. My good friend said that it must be a sign, I should let go of the Spearmint.

But I was thinking... If I let go now, I don't think I'll ever want to fall in love again. I don't think I could handle it. Why can't I just focus on work and leave it at that?

I can bring you everything that floats into your mind... -- Anything But Down, Sheryl Crow

And to think that I could have given the world; I could give everything. Well, right now, I can't. Given to the amount of work I've been doing and the lack of resources on hand. People do not want to pay me on time; everything is on the waiting period. All this work and I don't feel any richer. Payments are making it on time but my bank should be getting bigger and bigger. After all, I had a commercial and a movie script that was finished. Where's the money? Where's the love? I really don't get it.

I don't think I have the strength to go through something like that again. Considering the fact that as much as I try, I cannot let the Spearmint go. I can't. I want to but I can't.

And am I stupid enough to wanna fall again? `Cause I've gotten used to the crash and burn... -- Crash and Burn, Sheryl Crow

Watched around 9 or 10 movies from Saturday night to Monday morning. In a way, that was one of the reasons for deciding to letting the Spearmint know how I feel. Saw a lovely movie called Beautiful Things. It was quite lovely. And I just said, "Fuck it! The Spearmint should know..."

At the same time, I feel like I want to give up everything, quit work and disappear for three weeks and just write. The inspiration to write has never been stronger after that. Saw beautiful movies, saw one of my favourite singers/songwriters Bjork on her one and only acting performance in 'Dancer in the Dark' and considering that I'm a fan; this is so not a biased opinion: she was really good.

But now, I'm lost in orbit. I'm spinning in the air as I'm floating... Floating and wondering what the hell happened, what did I do wrong this time? Wrong place? Wrong time? Wrong person?

Again and again and again... It always happens to me. I've quit smoking and alcohol and drugs. Maybe this time, I can quit on love.

I spent a year in the mouth of a whale... -- Riverwide, Sheryl Crow